Friday, September 11, 2009

Remembering

If I am quite honest, I have not thought much about 9-11-01 today. I didn't forget entirely. It occurred to me at some point that today 8 years ago was a horrific day. I wondered, as I do on every anniversary if something else might happen. Something marking the anniversary of a day that changed so many lives. I felt sadness, perhaps even fear. But I put it behind me and moved along with my day, on the hunt for baseball equipment and work clothes for Kevin. Busy with school pickups and dishes and laundry and every number of mundane things. I may not of even remembered before falling asleep if not for a friend asking "where were you."

I walked into work, 2 and a half months pregnant, a little disgruntled that the receptionist was running late and I would have to answer the phones until she got there. Minutes later, a salesman ran up to the front desk & mentioned a plane flying into the World Trade Center. We believed at that time that it was an accident. A small plane, flying too low, got off course somehow. It was unbelievable, but we made sense of it all.

Until... plane two hit building two. We stood at the door of the VP of the company's desk and watched the first tower fall on tv. I was flooded with memories of the Oklahoma City Alfred P. Murrah federal building bombings. I remembered the fear I felt that day. Of the friend's who lost loved ones in that attack and I tried, unsuccessfully, as I did that other far off day, to make some sort of sense of it all. Sense of the hatred, and anger that must be present to do such a thing.

I sat and wondered what kind of world I was bringing my child into. My much longed for, waited for, hoped for child... what kind of life would he see. The rest of the day is a blur. I tried to focus on work things in between listening to talk radio and running to my boss' office to get updates on tv. I remember the Pentagon attack, and wondering where my Father in Law was in relation to the crash as he was on a business trip to DC that day. When I heard of flight 93 going down in Pennsylvania, I wondered to myself when this was ever going to end. If this was the beginning of an age of terrorism and violence.

More news, the company Kevin worked for at the time had their New York office in one of the WTC buildings. That was scary for awhile.

My Father in Law ended up being fine, and the people that worked for my husband's company evacuated their building, and were never in harms way, but almost 3000 people left this world that day as a result of hatred, and anger. I still ask myself why. My heart goes out to the families of the victims today, as it did that day years ago.

Even though I wasn't personally affected, my deep gratitude is given to the rescue workers, to the people who worked to clean up the site. To the people on Flight 93, for their bravery in the face of terror. For each and every hero, on that day and after I give my thanks.

In February 2008, I was in NYC and visited Ground Zero. Words can not express how it felt to see the place where the twin towers used to stand, and where it not for terrorists who destroyed it still would.

My words are inadequate to do justice to the emotion I felt on September 11, 2001. Eight years ago. Still heartbreaking, still horrific. I remember.

Thank you Sue for making me take the time to really reflect on that day.

Where were you on 9/11/01?

1 comment:

Sue @ Laundry for Six said...

Aw, wow. Awesome post. I had those same thoughts. Is this the end of life as we know it? Is this the beginning of a reign of terror. Is this a world I should be bringing children into. It all felt so very wrong that day. And for a long time after.

Related Posts with Thumbnails