Me Vs. Fish

Awhile back I decided to try out a local fish market that claims to specialize in Fresh Fish. Not coincidentally, this was at the same time that I wanted to try a recipe for Ahi Tuna but did not really trust the fish departments at any of the grocery stores we frequent. Anyway, got the tuna, and looked over their list of fresh items for the day. On that list was whole yellow snapper and it was a really good price so I got one. They were even nice enough to descale the thing for me. So I brought home my whole fish and stuck it in the freezer. This probably negates the whole "fresh" idea, but that night Ahi was on the menu.

Since then, Mr. Fishy has taunted me every time I've opened the freezer. "You'll never cook me. You are scared of me because I still have my head on my body. You'll never do it! Hahahahaha!!" He's pretty mouthy for a dead fish.

Yesterday, I took Mr. Fishy out of the freezer and put him into the fridge. I found a recipe and stopped cold when I read the part about "gutting" the fish. This whole time I've been worried about the head and never even thought about the.. ahem... insides. Ewwww. WHY did I buy that fish? Oh yea, fresh... and inexpensive. Darn.

Would you believe that even after chilling out in the fridge all day (with occasional "you'll never eat me, you are too squeamish lady!") Mr Fishy was still frozen mostly solid. So, I put off the unpleasant task of beheading and de-gutting until today. I just checked and Mr. Fishy is thaw, and in the interest of not letting him spoil, I plan to cook him today. I even have a recipe picked out.

I'm not looking forward to this you all. I have a backup plan for pork chops on the grill just in case I chicken out.

I'm putting up a poll to see who you think will win in this woman vs. fish drama. Be sure to vote!!

I am SO Embarrassed!

How many times in your life have you uttered that phrase? I think, for me it must be at least a million. I have a tendency to be a klutz, say the wrong thing, walk into a school function with food a kid has smeared on my shirt (or maybe I just say the kids did it). I could go on and on.

In honor of the Silicon Valley Moms Group's April Book club book, I am about to divulge what I consider my most embarrassing moment. Warning, don't read this right now if you are about to or have just had a meal, or if you have a sensitive stomach. Or if you are drinking anything lest you spit it all over your monitor. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Sigh.

Okay, here goes.

When I was pregnant with Eric I failed my first Gestational Diabetes test. Therefore, I had to take the three hour test to determine if I needed to make any diet changes, etc. The test itself went better than I had envisioned it, and despite having to drink the orange syrupy liquid I held up pretty well.

On my way out the door I was starving and called my husband to see if he wanted me to meet him somewhere for lunch before I headed off to work. I, for still unknown reasons, thought Taco Bell sounded like a good plan. Can you see where this is going?

I took one bite of my taco and according to my husband, my face turned green. Simultaneously, my stomach became very, violently ill and I ran to the bathroom. Sadly, I did not make it quite in time, and while the worst of it got in the toilet, it also was on the floor of the restaurant, in my hair. I noticed as I tried to clean up that this bathroom had no paper towels, only a hand dryer, which was not what I needed to clean up the horrific mess I had left.

Since I was taking awhile attempting to clean myself up with toilet paper, my husband got concerned and I heard him talking outside the bathroom door. "Could I go in there and help her?" to which the Taco Bell employee replied "Are you sure she's in there?" Confused, he said "yes, she ran in there when she got sick." "Oh," said the girl who was mopping up my mess in the dining room, "well, sure you can go in there. It's the men's room."

It was at that point that I started crying uncontrollably. Throwing up all over the place wasn't bad enough, I had to run into the men's bathroom to do it. I was just so thankful no one had been in there using it.

As with most of my embarrassing moments, I can laugh about this now, but at the time it was very, most assuredly, not.funny.


This post was inspired by "Much to Your Chagrin, a Memoir of Embarrassment", by Suzanne Guillette. Suzanne shares her own embarrassing moments as well as those of others who were surprisingly ready to tell their most humiliating moments. I admire Suzanne for writing her story, and for her ability to talk to strangers and put them at ease enough to tell her what they did or said that embarrassed them the most. I took away from this book a much needed reminder that we all have these moments, and it's how we react to them that really matters. We all could use a good laugh at our own expense now and then. For more discussion of the book, and other embarrassing stories, please visit Silicon Valley Moms for today's book club!

Feel free to share your own embarrassing moments here or over at the discussion.

Spring is Here

Isn't it great? I mean, we don't get any kind of real winter,but yesterday we were able to go to the pool! Amazing!

The arrival of Spring is also bring all of the animals out of the woodwork. It is pretty cool, but sometimes overwhelming. I have a post up today at Deep South Moms where I talk all about it.

Circular Logic

Zack: Wahhhhhh (like he literally says Wah, not actually crying)
Me: Why are you fussing.
Zack: I not fussing, I CY-ing.
Me:Then why are you crying?
Zack: Because I'm saaaaaad.
Me: Why are you sad?
Zack: Because I CY-ing. (Be sure when you are reading this to know that the word crying is really long and drawn out, like every last word of every sentence is when Zack is speaking.)
Me: Sigh...
Zack: giggles

Super Spy Mark

Mark is a super spy. Make no mistake, he's not pretending to be a super spy. He really is! It's very exciting! " Today Mark is getting rocket shoes and a helping hand." He has found another super spy at school that he gets his gadgets from and teaching all the tricks any super spy needs to know.

Some things you will find interesting about super spies...

1. Super spies do not do chores.
2. Super spies have powers.
3. He *might* "rocket home" from school in his rocket shoes tomorrow. (Must remember to tell my friend who picks the boys up.)
4. Super spies have many gadgets. Mark's gadgets include an invisible Ipod, power, invisible lasers. That's all he has so far, but he plans to get many many more gadgets.
5. Super spies also read over my shoulder while I'm blogging this and inform me of typos. This must mean they are really very smart!

Apparently, this topic is hot hot hot at kindergarten. I did inform Super Spy Mark that he needs to talk about this at recess or other free time, and not while his teacher is teaching. I'm pretty sure Super Spies have to learn about reading and math too.

* sentence that is quoted came straight from Mark's mouth, thought I should give him credit for that line.
*Zack is now telling me that he too is a super spy. He has flying power.
*Also we really must find a way around item 1. Because, no.
*I keep adding to this post because, frankly I find this hilarious. Although I have moments of wondering if he in fact is going to get to school today and NOT get rocket shoes & be very disappointed. He said something to the affect of I hope S really gives me my rocket shoes today. Also, this morning he was asking me everyones shoe sizes. So, I tried to gently tell him that the rocket shoes might be "Invisible" like his Ipod, and he said quite seriously. "Mom, you know the Ipod IS real." So, not sure what to make of this except to find it so extremely funny.

Well At Least He Didn't Escape Again

I'm telling you Ben might just do me in.

This time he didn't run down the road half naked.

This time, he didn't color with Sharpie on our leather sofa.

This time...

He locked me out of the house.

Let's set the scene. I had a letter to put in the mailbox and he wanted to go outside. I let him come out with me since keeping him close is always a good thing. Plus he loves to be out there. So, he came out and hung around by the front door which was perfect because I thought it would be easier to get back into the house. If only.

If only Kevin hadn't been at Sams with Eric and Mark it wouldn't have mattered.

If only Zack hadn't been glued to the computer and wouldn't come to the door no matter how many times I rang the doorbell. No matter how I ran to the back and shouted through the window for him to go to the front door. Darn computer addict!

If only little Ben could have UNLOCKED the door he had locked just seconds before.

At least the neighbors walked over and tried to tell Ben to get Zack. Ben got a book and brought it to the door. They were good enough to stand and laugh with me while we tried to figure out a way to get me back in the house.

At least Kevin got home 5 minutes after the whole door locking episode.

Ay yi yi.

Once Upon a Time There Was A Garden

I've always loved the idea of having a garden. What I don't love is the work associated with it. Weeding. Bugs. Oh, and it's DIRTY. Nevertheless growing my own food sounds really appealling. Once I had a garden in our house in Oklahoma and it was moderately successful until the heat of summer scorched everything and I left the remains there until time to plant the next year. Have I mentioned yard work is not my specialty?

Anyway, last year we planted a cherry tomato plant. It grew tall and strong and had zillions of cherry tomatoes on it just waiting to ripen. And then some animal ate all of them. So I said, once again... no gardening for ME.

Except there's the whole draw of fresh veggies.

Early in the spring we had our patio screened in so we can sit out there this summer without getting attacked by mosquitos... or this guy*! Yikes!

Right around the same time Kevin decided to buy a dwarf key lime tree, and a tangerine as well, just for fun. So they went out to our patio.
Then I went a little nuts and decided to really start in on this patio garden project. I started seeds for tomatoes, cilantro, peppers (both sweet and hot!) and waited to see what would happen.

The tomato seeds have become big tomato plants! They are flowering now! So exciting!

The fruit trees are finished blooming, and could that be itty baby LIMES I see? Maybe. I sure hope so!

This tree we bought just last weekend. It's an avocado tree. If I get one avocado off of it I'll be surprised, and totally giddy!

The pepper plants are thriving and about to flower too! I can already taste the salsa!

But no salsa is complete without cilantro! The cilantro has already been used a lot (out of the other pots) and it's kindly regenerating itself.

And here's a gratuitous picture of Ben. Just because he's cute!

After the success of the first round of seeds I decided to try some more. We then planted carrots, green onions, thyme, basil, and spinach. MMMM

I hope my little garden continues to thrive (thanks to my husband who remembers to water them far more often than I do) and actually produces the veggies I desire.

*While alligators are not commonly likely to attack people I don't like the looks of this fellow. He's not like the skinny 2-3 foot gators we saw last year. He's BIG and in.my.back.yard. So, he stays close to the water. I still don't approve.

Another Blast From the Past

Yesterday I was dealing with some major nap time madness of the variety which takes the 2 year old 2 hours to finally fall asleep. I was irritable and frustrated because I need Ben to nap so I can stay sane get anything done around here.



As I tried to remember what Eric and Mark were like at roughly the same ages Zack and Ben are I initially thought it was so.much.easier. Then I had a flash of memory that made me crack up at my selective memory. Oh, the things I repress!

One day, in our house in Georgia I put two small boys in their beds for naps. This was before Eric started PreK, and he was still technically napping, although obviously not well, so I'm going to say they were 2 and 3. Things were fairly quiet and I was happy that I won the naptime battle without an actual battle. Score one for Mommy! Only, then I went out to check the mail and heard voices. Being slightly slow, I wandered back inside wondering why I could hear them so well when they were in their room. I puzzled it over for just a second and stepped back outside. I can laugh about what I saw now. Then it scared the life out of me. My two and three year old boys had opened their bedroom window, pushed the screen out and climbed right OUT. There they sat, between the house and the shrub playing with toys they had brought out.

Sigh. This is when we learned about these alarms that were so loud that the kids were too scared to open the window! We've recently put this on the garage door since Kevin decided a hook and eye would be annoying. Something about wanting to be able to get in the house when he gets home from work.

Yes, this reminds me that they also were once crazy toddlers and I made it through that stage with them. Maybe I'll survive this too.

Great Morning

This morning my kids slept in til 7 and the big guys got up first. Eric and Mark snuggled with me in my bed for about 10 minutes before we had to get up and get them ready for school. This was so sweet and nice, and gives me confidence that Mark's recent comment isn't really valid.

Now they are at school, and I'm watching the weather because there are tornado warnings today. Growing up in Oklahoma, I should be used to this by now, but I really just am not.

Easter

Mark is a planner and by Thursday afternoon he had totally planned our Easter. We were going to have a party! At 5 PM! And invite ALLLLLL our neighbors! He even made an invitation. I was looking for something a teensy bit more low key. As in, egg hunts, too much candy brought by a bunny and a nice family dinner.


In the end, Momma won out and everyone was mostly happy.

We colored eggs on Saturday and I have to say this was the MOST fun I've had doing this activity with the boys. They could do some decorating themselves and only Ben had to be super closely monitored to avoid insanity. To aid in this endeavor, I gave him some crayons and let him color the paper we had laid down to protect the table. We all had a blast!

They loved the candy in the baskets, but also the Easter Grass makes an awesome wig! Who knew?

Ben was pretty proud of the one egg he found all by himself. Then he lost interest in the hunt.

Later the boys decided to hide the eggs from us and then we found them. This year, they did a really good job of hiding. A little too good, actually as one is still MIA. I'm hoping I'll find it as I clean up the Easter explosion that seems to have occurred here yesterday.

I hope everyone had a perfect day yesterday!

There's a New Blog Out There

You want to read something awesome? Corie is a friend of mine that I "met" online when I was pregnant with Zack. Are you familiar with IVillage & all the crazy Expecting Club groups? Well this awesome group of ladies started out there, and when the craziness was all too crazy (DUDE there are some insane people on IVillage!) we (about 60 of us) split and formed a private group. I've only actually hung out with Corie one time as she lives Far Far Away, but she is really one of my favorite people in the world.

Reasons why you will love her blog: She is FUNNY, real and an awesome mom who still has a strong sense of who she is. Something I feel like I have sometimes lost. Did I mention she is also FUNNY!

If you need a starting place read this post... but really, just read the whole blog, it's new, and it's awesome!

Things I Never Dreamed I'd Have to Say

I've wanted to be a Mommy for as long as I can remember. There were things about parenthood that I knew would be hard. When I was pregnant with Eric I got the standard "Your life is about to CHANGE" advice. I was pretty sure I would have sleepless nights and I knew I was ready due to the 3700 parenting books I read during that first pregnancy. There are parts of motherhood, however, that you simply can not prepare for.

I have a running list of things that in all my wildest dreams I never thought I would have to say.
There are the standard things that I just thought I would never say because I would be AWESOME. Turns out I'm not so awesome because I regularly say "Because I said so," and "Do I need to call Daddy?" Also I say no a whole lot more than I imagined I would. Among the more entertaining things (because kids like to keep life interesting):

• We don't eat baby wipes.
• We don't put things in our nose.
• Hey! Who wants to play the quiet game!!
• You have to wear pants to go outside.
• No you may not eat chocolate chips for breakfast.
• We don't wash the floor with toilet water (eek)
• Do.not.lick.me!!!!
• Stop pulling my ears!

What have you found yourself saying that you never saw coming?

Spring Break Survival Guide

1. Have company. Extra hands are good. Especially when they are grandparently hands.

2. Do not expect to do anything BO- WING aka anything remotely interesting to yourself.

3. Plan ahead. If you plan to actually accomplish anything rev up the Wii or cartoons or computer games.

4. If you decide to do something BO - WING such as shopping at the mall don't intend to actually shop. Instead, realize that Macy's is a FAB place for games such as I Spy and I'm thinking of a number between one and ten.


5. When all else fails revert to recommendation #2 and go let them play at the mall playground.

I Have Not Abandoned the Blogging Thing

I know, I know, I've been scarce. My parents have been in town and late last week I was busily cleaning for their visit, and then when they got here we got busy having FUN! Lots of fun. Also, lots of whining, fussing and general kid crankiness... "What do you mean I can't have and do every little thing I want? Come ON mom!" Okay, they didn't say that, but the behavior was totally telling me that's what they were thinking.

I will blog all about the things we did later! Right now I'm kind of afraid of what might happen if I let my guard down. I'm sure I'll explain that later too.

How'd We Get Here?

Today Eric is seven. Seven. I've been mulling it over in my mind for months and wondering how that happened. How did this guy...

... my cuddly little buddy turn into a big boy with long, lanky arms and legs? He still likes to sit in my lap sometimes, only know his sharp elbows dig into me. Yet I still love those moments, when he wants to sit in his momma's lap.

How did this shy little fellow...

...so shy and nervous to head off to school, become such an eager student? Ready to learn and all too soon a second grader.

I really don't feel old enough to have a kid this big, but it seems it's true. How did my baby boy get so BIG?

Happy Birthday Eric! You bring such joy and fun to our family. You amaze me every single day!

Obsessing

I have this slightly obsessive part of my personality that revolves primarily around my wanting people to like me. I have a need to be accepted, to not offend others, and also... I'd like to come across as an intelligent person. At least most of the time. I'm addled enough with mommy brain that it's not realistic to seem intelligent all of the time.

Anyway. I also LOVE getting comments on my blogs. Both here and over at Deep South Moms. Comments make me happy. Comments from friends & family are awesome, and comments from people who have just found me somehow, who've bothered to stick around and read, and something hit home enough that they took the time to type out a little comment are so very special to me.

Sometimes comments are puzzling, and sometimes downright annoying. If you actually read my blog, I'm not talking to you. I'm talking about comments like the one I got awhile back on a post about what I should put on my Ipod. Anonymous took the time to comment "you are such a geek. get a life. put whatever songs you want on your ipod! only you know what you like!" Okay anonymous... whatever. YOU are the one that googled "What should I put on my Ipod" and found my blog and took time out of your day to call me names. What does that make YOU? Besides anonymous, I mean. (By the way, the anonymous thing: ANNOYING)

Then there are the stupid spammy comments which fortunately I've only had one of.

The catalyst for all this thought on people liking me and comments in such is a comment from my Deep South Moms post yesterday. Someone named Sam said "ok." That's it. Just "ok." Can I tell you how I've wondered about this today? Was it okay? Like what was your point? Or ok like that was a crappy post. Or Ok, oops I hit the button and it posted but I didn't finish and didn't have time to go back and fix it. Or perhaps "ok" you are a terrible mother, how could you possibly think you are not. Or give it up lady, your writing is awful. See, this is where the wanting people to like me obsession comes into play. I wish Sam (if that is in fact a real name, as their was no profile set up to view - kind of like anonymous) would have just left a real comment. Even if it was scathing, rude or you know, calling me out on my crappy mothering or writing. But the cryptic "ok" has driven me nuts all day.

Clearly, I have issues. And it's okay for you to say so. Lately one of my issues has been wondering if I'll ever be a "good" writer. I feel like I'm actually getting worse instead of better lately and now the abrupt slowing of ideas is totally frustrating me. So, when I pour my heart out, sharing mistakes and frustrations and get "ok" back, it sends me a little into a tizzy. So, tell me what you think. But don't be anonymous or cryptic. Ok Sam?